On the way outs...

Getting laid off is an odd experience...there are so many things that run through your head at one time. You can't focus on any one of them for too long because the moment you do another thought just jumps right in front...and you can forget about focusing on anything your manager is telling you because half your brain goes numb from the freak out bombardment and the other half is trying to think how you are going to get a job...

The numb side of your head goes something like this:

What the f*ck?!

This can't be happening!

Is he talking to me?!

I got bills, loans, rent...what the f*ck am I going to do?!

This is so embarrassing!

How am I going to tell my parents I no longer have a job?

2-weeks severance? What the hell is that?! How much is that?!

How much to I have in savings?

How do I tell my girlfriend that i got no endz?

Its 9.30 in the morning...what about all the meetings I have today?

Why me?!

Again, what the F*CK?!

Then you have to leave the room...and you start thinking about things that don't matter at all, but you can't help it because immediately upon leaving you feel this heavy blanket of "everyone already knows and I'm just the last to know." And that blanket is made of very heavy wool...

Everyone is sad for you, some are actually sad others are sort of sad but they all are grateful its you and not them. Never be fooled by a tear that may drop or a firm hug from someone that still has their job. Call me bitter, but when someone who is keeping their job comes up to console you, you know they are wanting to see a train wreck or something. I mean, I had people that were saying goodbye to be that I never talked to...not even on my first day when you meet everyone. It was like they were waiting from some "nigga" moment to happen so they can have something to point to and say, "see I told you he'd snap....you owe me 5 bucks!"

It was pretty pathetic but there was a blessing in all this. I really didn't like the place that much anyway and was planning to find a way out once my project was over...they just beat me to the punch...

So now I sit, make contact with other firms, apply for unemployment, stay as positive as possible and hope for the best.

And Now Door #3:

Dogglounge.com

I haven't been able to find a better place for Deep House Music...and not the cheezy advance lounge stuff...the real deal Hollifield stuff..

Enjoy,

DjD